If there is a time that has tested the relationship of many it’s the pandemic times. Many couples have found themselves needing to learn how to spend a lot more time around each other. Meanwhile many single people have found themselves looking for love on dating apps. But despite those challenges we faced we learn that our relationships are worth maintaining. So if you are looking for a little inspiration for your love life, here are my favorite bits of dating and relationships advice from experts.
1. Communication is important but it is not the only thing.
“Feeling love and appreciation is necessary for good communication. Feeling a loving connection with your partner and knowing that you are appreciated can be more important than practicing active listening. People can always imitate the mechanics of communication; they can go through the motions. But if their heart is not in the right place, the very tools of communication that they say are so important can also be used to manipulate, avoid, or even attack the other person.” Linda Carroll, marriage therapist.
2. Breakups aren’t always permanent.
“It is always helpful to remember that breakups are not always permanent. You can always go back to that person with the added bonus of maturity and self work, but sometimes it takes time alone to do it. If the ending of the relationship was done in love, there’s always an opportunity to re-meet them later; just make sure it’s for the right reasons and not because you are using them as a scratching post for loneliness.” Julie Nguyen, Relationship coach.
3. Don’t forget the mental load when splitting up the chores.
“Women do a lot of more of what sociologists call ‘invisible’ or ‘cognitive’ labor. Example of these are that even when husbands do unpaid work (Like housework and child care) they still depend on wives to tell them what to do and when. So let’s say a husband is going to grocery shop for the family. The wife will be the one who looks at their fridge, their pantry, thinks about what they are missing, what they will need in the next week or so, and makes a list. The husband goes and shops, often even calling the wife if he can’t find an item to get her to guide him. So any negotiation of housework should incorporate this kind of work too.” Alias Hamid, Sociologist.
4. Your partner cannot fulfill you 100% and you shouldn’t expect them to do that.
“You shouldn’t be seeking full validation from your partner when you are married anyway. There is a level of being happy with you that you have to manage in a relationship. And what I mean by that is, you can’t look for another person whether that is your spouse to fulfill you 100%. You have to be happy with yourself. You have to have your own career goals. You have to fulfill your self love mentally, spiritually, emotionally and all of those things.